big girls don't cry?

Uh, yeah.

I just completely broke down this morning in my kitchen. I mean, com-plete-ly lost it. Tears. The shoulder shaking kind. The followed by a killer headache kind. The surely-someone-must-have-died kind. And all because of this wedding insanity I've got going on around here.

I do realize that a good portion of it is self imposed stressing. I get that I don't have to make homemade whole-grain honey mustard as thank you gifts for the dinner party the boy's parents' friends are throwing in our honor this Saturday night. And I'm sure my bridesmaids wouldn't be mad if I didn't make their herbal tea hostess presents from scratch for my upcoming bachelorette party weekend. Just like I know my family will appreciate whatever token I give them in April come wedding time, hand crafted or not. But those are the things I'm actually enjoying!! And that's what is so hard to explain to people as they see me edging up to that line just south of crazy. The stuff that could be cut out is the stuff that's most important to me.

It made me so freakin' happy to track down yellow and brown mustard seeds in bulk the other day. I had a ball reading about the potential effects of lemon balm and rose hip for use in a calming/sleepy time tea. And I want to spend the time required to make something for my family that might have some small chance of telling them just how much I love and value each of one them. It's all the other stuff that I want to be able to just snap my fingers and have them magically crossed off my to do list!

No one stepped up last post to help me figure out the whole cloning thing. How about magic? The Harry Potter variety. Anybody? No?

*big sigh*

No worries. I'll just add it to that infamous list of mine;)