Thursday, September 3, 2009

those cowboys and their sad, sad songs

This morning I was sitting in Cafe Brazil drinking a cup of Organic Colombian Estate and waiting for my oatmeal to arrive when over the restaurant speakers the following song:

Every rose has it's thorn,
just like every night has it's dawn . . .

I was immediately taken back to the beginning of my freshman year of high school and a mixer in our cafeteria. A junior or senior, possibly named Jeremy although that part's a little fuzzy, had just asked me to dance. To this song. I have a very distinct inner-monologue memory: this is me, grown up.

As I now sit here typing, I am aware of the many directions I could go. I could delve into the difference between being expectant and having expectations. My original intent when I opened Blogger this morning and certainly a concept I could apply to the above. Or I could walk a little further down memory lane. Reliving old joys and disappointments. Part of me wants desperately to indulge in thoughts of the future: Where am I going? What's my next step? In that imagined snapshot of my life to come, who's standing next to me with a matching cheesy smile?

Maybe what I really need to do is stay in the moment. This exact one. I so rarely do that. I spend such precious little time in the present. Always seeming to look ahead. Or spending significant time looking back. Perhaps I'll set that as a challenge. I'll live today, today. And try not to let future plans or past memories factor into the decisions I make as I move through the only Thursday September 3, 2009 that I'm ever gonna get.

I'll let you know how I do:)

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