I-70's looking pretty good . . .

I am exhausted.

I spent the weekend in Chicago with friends for Ian's 30th birthday. We had a great time. Really great. But. I think this weekend has confirmed for me what I have long suspected. I am getting old. Getting? Hell, may already be there. I just can't keep up like I used to. Thankfully, with age comes wisdom. I feel I now know my limits and try to back off as I approach them. Result being, finished the weekend being the only one not to get completely smashed. Even better, hangover free. Of course that placed me in the mom role a couple of times over the past few days. Do I gravitate to that role or does it gravitate towards me? So, despite my surviving Chicago sans smash the end result was unfortunately still the following blog opener:

I am exhausted.

Thank God that wisdom, again, comes with age. Because I had the foresight to take today off as well. What does it say about me that I have to have a day off to recover from a day off?

Now here I sit. Drinking coffee, eating peanut butter toast, and blogging about the state of my life. The state overall, as I see it, is good. Let me dissect it a bit below . . .

The Chicago trip,in spite of the extreme fatigue, was perfect in a lot of ways. If you've never visited the city in the fall you are missing out. The weather was beautiful. Spent some quality time with good friends. Even made a new friend - so nice to meet you Katie! Got a little shopping in. Ate. A lot. My favorite culinary experience was our Hot Dog Adventure Tour. Guess I'll be blogging about that in the near future since I've already titled it:)

Recently reconnected with a really good friend via phone that I haven't seen in an embarrassingly long time. Actually have plans to reconnect with her in person later today. Because here's the thing. She lives in Dallas and I haven't seen her in almost a year. I told you it was embarrassing!

Re connections are apparently my thing lately. Been getting to hang out with a friend who's been out of the country and in a week he'll be moving to Argentina (!). Getting my Garrison time in:) And I've seen another great friend twice in the past ten days that I probably haven't been able to hang out with in months. Definitely been reconnecting.

And the job? Let's skip that for now.

The problem is this: For every reconnection I've made, I have 3 other people I've been neglecting. For every trip I've made or city I've visited, I have 5 other places I've never been that I feel drawn to explore. For every day off I have that gives me some Amy time, I crave another week of days filled with the same.

Who's life is this? Is it mine? Did I make it what it is? Or did it morph on its own? If I'm the creator, did I do right by me or have I made one huge mistake followed by another? The overall state may be good, even appealing, on the surface. But - and here's the real question - is it the state I want to live in?

Maybe it's time to think about relocation.